While a few embezzlers and bankers have already been shipped into campus, the majority of students have no knowledge of this change.
Administration says with the constant policing, fencing, ID checks, and locked doors, it was an easy change to make. The University aspect of campus will still operate in order to allow all of us to enter back into society.
“I always thought this was a prison. No one is out of their cells,” explained student Ryan C. “Who cares? My Calc class is now full of top bankers caught for serious crimes and given minimal sentences. I’m using this to pad my LinkedIn profile”.