A new bill proposed Tuesday to merge all twelve state university system schools into one Florida University, FU, was introduced to the State Senate. The bill aims to increase the cost of degrees to taxpayers following the House of Representatives push to reduce them.
“Taxpayers have a right to know their tax dollars are being spent frivolously,” said Senator Thomas Hyde. Hyde has been a leader in inserting costs and promoting socialism. Hyde confirmed the bill is a direct response to the House of Representatives bill aiming to do the opposite. “It’s the partisan reality” Hyde continued.
Students across the state expressed concerns over losing their university culture. Others are excited. “It used to be so hard to take classes at another university,” said Business Administration student Leslie Hudson. “After this bill, I could take classes anywhere, since it’s the same school.”
Students aren’t the only ones stunned. Anglers are reeling, as the bill would also increase the cost of a fishing license and introduce background checks.
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Well, at least the University of South Florida would be more aptly geographically named.